Part of being a picky eater is eliminating virtually all the restaurants in a 50 mile radius. I don't even know that I'm picky. I just don't like crappy food. If you're going to go out to eat, it should be phenomenal and not just, "We'll at least I didn't have to cook and clean up." I'd rather cook and clean up and have a kick ass meal than go eat chicken tacos that taste like a weird combination of spicy and sour. People ask me, "Where do you want to eat?" Look, if I gave you a list of all the places we can't eat, we'd just end up eating at my house. Which wouldn't be bad. I don't have fun snacks though. You might want to bring your own.
I also don't like pasta. I don't like the taste or texture or chewing it. I don't like the way it sits in my stomach like a brick. And part of my late-in-the-game never-really-going-to-see-it-through New Year's Resolution is to eat more fruits and vegetables, so I'm always on the look out for things that don't contain pasta, which is really pretty easy. Duh. But I guess pasta-makeover recipes where you try to trick your mind, body, soul, and dinner companions into thinking it's pasta. I found a recipe called Gluten Free No-Mac and Cheese. Pasta substitute? Cauliflower.
I didn't follow the recipe exactly because it called for coconut milk and 3 tablespoons of coconut flour, but the lack of desire to look for those ingredients won out and I used regular milk and flour. As an added bonus, the recipe neglected to mention a cooking temperature, so I had to guess. Spoiler alert: It wasn't right. I had to up the oven temp and cook it longer. That would never happen to Giada De Laurentiis. She would just KNOW. Sixteen days later I had Almost Mac and Cheese That's Not Even Gluten-Free that was really a soupy mess of cauliflower chunks. It looked nothing like the picture as per usual. And it was kind of bland. Why not just call it cheesy cauliflower bake and do away with the pretense?
Chris (not fooled): "That was supposed to be mac and cheese? Yeah, I knew that was cauliflower."
You failed, Popsugar. I tried another recipe tonight that substituted broccoli slaw for spaghetti. That one was actually good and easy. I would eat that one again and complain less than usual. Maybe I can come up with a substitute for complaining like vegetables is a "substitute" for pasta. It will never be the same though. Or as satisfying.